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Funny Status, Short Funny Quotes

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Funny Status Quotes Short Messages for Whatsapp Facebook

Everyone, except me, wants to become a millionaire. I want to become a billionaire.

I'm so sorry for not telling you this before. You ought to know how smart, cute, witty, sweet, charming, alluring and wonderful you are!… I didn't know I've influenced you that much!

Others say life is unfair. Well, it's true. Others are jealous of you. And they really should be. Wanna know why? Hmmm… coz you have a cute text mate like me.

Newsflash: Police are looking for a suspect who's smart, sexy, witty and very gorgeous. They've already eliminated you from the list of suspects. Where do you think I should hide?

If I were to make a dictionary:

Those innocent eyes… Those kissable lips… A great smile… The perfect walk… Smoothest talk… Absolutely gorgeous.. That's enough bout me. How about you?

When he was five years old, he wanted to become a lawyer. Now that he is a lawyer, he acts like a five-years old.

The only person who can make her smile is a dentist.

Looks may capture the eyes but it's the personality that captures the heart. And, I have both.

When you feel that nobody loves you, that nobody cares, when all you can do is cry and walk away because everyone is against you, then you are the weakest link. Goodbye!

Someday you may lose your hair, you may lose your teeth, your money and even lose your mind. But one thing you will never lose – your good looks, coz you can never lose what you don't have!

Why do we sleep? Because we need to take a break from texting. Have a nice dream while texting.

How can you know if a person is cute? First, he or she has a poor memory. Second – umn … I forgot na!

Our friendship means a lot to me, that if we were the last people on a sinking ship and there's only one life vest, I'll..uhm.. ah.. eh..I'm gonna miss you for sure!

Reporter: How does it feel to become a millionaire? Millionaire: Sad, because I am not a billionaire.

Funny Status for Whatsapp Facebook

While walking down the street, I heard an old man say "I've been in love with the same woman for almost 50 years now." I was touched until I heard him say "I wish she knew."

I may not be your PEPSI choice of the new generation; I may not be your COKE, only the real thing; or your NIDO, world's no. 1 but I can be your REXONA I won't let you down.

If you are alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile. If you need money, wait for your salary.

No matter how sad, no matter how sick, I feel better just thinking of you… But I'm happier each time I send you a message 'coz I know I'll be disturbing you!

If they say "Good looks could kill", then please don't look at me! I don't wanna see you die!

I read on the newspaper that sending text messages causes a radiation that is cancerous. That's why I have decided to stop – to stop reading newspapers.

Why do I miss you? Because you make me smile. You are so kind. You are so sweet. You are very funny. And most of all, because you are not texting me any more. That's why.

When you are in love, you wish you were married. When you are married, you wish you were in love.

The rain makes all things beautiful, the grass and flowers too. But if rain really makes all things beautiful, why doesn't it rain on you?

Whenever I hear people say something bad about you, like when they say that you are not cute enough, I would always come to your defense and say "She's trying to be one naman a!"

I hate blackout. Never mind the arson, never mind TV and stereo, never mind the internet. But if I could not recharge my cell phone so I could keep texting, that's another point. I hate blackout.

Every time I hold her hand, I feel like holding my cheek. She always slaps me on the face.

Learn to appreciate art," I told my girlfriend. She said, "How could I appreciate you, then?"

You've got sex appeal, you've got style, you've got intelligence, and you've got class. You've got the face and you've got the body but I've got the wrong number… Sorry!

We hate others for imitating us. We are irritated by their attitude.

I'm sure you were born in this world as a cute baby. Now that you're a grownup, I have one question….. What happened?

A small child:
Ap Kisi Larki Ko Pyar Kerte Hain?
Tumhari Maa Se.
Bare Chalaak Hain
Ghar me Hi Chakar Chalaya Hua Hy

Q: What is the difference between a wife and a magnet?
A: Magnets have a positive side!

Difference between
Any word said by girlfriend is "Poetry"
Anything said by wife is an "Essay"!

Agar kisi pe Bharosa karo to Akhir tak
Bharosa karo
Natija Chahy Jo B Nikley
Akhir mein Ya To Apko 1 Sacha Dost Mile ga
Ya Phir 1 Acha Sabaq!

Application to the headmaster in punjabi :-
"Guzarish ey k mera hun school aan nu dil nai kerda,
Tusi kurian v alag ker ditian ne te sadi class wich ek vi kuri nai hagi,
Tay Madam v koi khas nai,
Hor nai te
"Kam Valiyan" e sonyan rakh lo, Bari Meherbani.
Tuada Faithfully Student
Pappu dukhi

Lesson of life……..
Never beleive 2 persons
1) a lady with tears
2) a man with smile…..
chaho tu azma lo

Hamesha apni pasand k raste pr chalo,
Apne alfaz me bat kro,
Sirf wo kro jo apka dil kahe or phir daikhna 1 din saari dunia kahe gi….
Ay kanjar kise di nai manda.